life sucks

the job interview in waynesville, NC was just cancelled. they already hired someone. personally, i think that's a little crappy. but whatever. that only leaves me one this week - jefferson city. then after that...nothing. no jobs out there to apply for. i'm going to wind up working in some awful clinic that reuses syringes and surgery packs without sterilizing them between patients and that vaccinates yearly and that doesn't gown up for surgery.

I DON'T WANT TO DO THAT.

i love being kicked (even if unintentionally) while i'm down.

so, since i have an unplanned 2 week hiatus from work, i am staying with my best friend and her husband (coincidentally, my brother-in-law) at the old stomping grounds. i'm trying to relax, regroup, and repair my damaged psyche for the last push of 2 months.

right before i left home on thursday night to come here, my orange tabby made a jailbreak (he does this periodically). mostly he goes and sits on the neighbor's back stoop, beats up the stray living on our back porch, chases some wildlife, and then comes back within 4 hours. i couldn't round him up and left him to forage for himself until my petsitter came by and let him in. except he hasn't come back. and in 36 hours, she has seen hide-nor-hair of him. i'm starting to really fret.

the husband went home today instead of staying here so that he could look for the cat. i'm trying not to feel flutters of panic (but my skin is doing that crawly thing that makes my heart kind of palpitate, and i feel tears just below the surface of my eyelids, and it's harder to breathe than normal).