the charmed life

(warning: somewhat rambling/incoherent post)

i'm sitting here at 5am unable to sleep (likely because i slept most of today). i've been playing on facebook. this is my new and total waste of time entertainment. hey - it's cheap! i just started a new album on my facebook - pictures of family functions. sitting here, going through the literally thousands of pictures from the last 4 years of my life (when i acquired my first real digital cam), i am moved by the photos.

what is so moving? perhaps you wonder. it stems from this: just 2 days ago, i read an article about modern day slavery. it was fascinating, compelling, and terribly sad. you can read it here (and i highly recommend it):

http://www.foreignpolicy.com/story/cms.php?story_id=4173

after finishing it, i sat for a while just thinking about the incomparable wealth that surrounds me. i'm not speaking only of the material wealth here - although i am surrounded by that in abundance, as well. i'm talking about the immaterial things. i have friends that love me, that care about my well-being, that i love. i have not one but two families - my own and that of my husband. they are both different and wonderful, and i love them both more than trite words or cliches can convey.

i've been a little sad tonight. i was looking at pictures of thanksgiving and christmas four years ago, and i came across pictures of my beautiful cousin. for those of you who started reading after i did a "blog cleanse" (i erase all old posts about once a year) - you probably don't know that my 2 year old cousin drowned in a terrible accident 3 years ago this past december. it was a shock my family weathered together. looking at his pictures tonight broke my heart a little. he was a beautiful little boy with a gorgeous smile, and we all loved him dearly. his funeral was attended by 300+ people. there wasn't room enough in the church. my uncle and aunt are extremely active in that church as are my grandparents. i've been going there with them since i was too young to remember. last year alone, they donated greater than $40,000 to the church (my uncle is a CEO). crosby and my family are loved. that outpouring was evident at his funeral.

it is evident every time i look at these pictures. i am blessed in every possible way that someone can be blessed. i have done nothing to deserve this richness in my life, and yet i have it.

i try to remind myself of that fact every single day - every sad day at work, every stressful moment, i look to what i have and take strength from that. i live in a nation of riches, i am free, i have 2 families to which i can always turn, i am never alone - no matter how sad i feel.