some thoughts

i should write when my mind is fresh with what i want to say. yesterday was a think-y sort of day and had i blogged then, i would have been eloquent, interesting, and witty. instead, i waited until today. last night as i laid in bed, trying (unsuccessfully) to sleep, i should have written this all down. now my thoughts are as stale as last week's bread. but oh well. i'll give it a shot. i'm feeling puny too - not sure why. headachy, tired, little bit queasy. at any rate, 2 of my classes are finished - infxs dz (A) and anesthesiology (B+). on thursday, i have a final in toxicology. i currently have a 96 in the class. i need to make an 80 on the final to keep that A. considering how little preparation i have done thus far - that might be harder than it sounds. then a week of nothing (except that i do my surgery on monday) - and then finals. i will be trite, briefly. this semester has soared past on leaden wings (is that possible?). maybe that wasn't so trite.

so - the thoughts i wanted to share.

first, a word on pet ownership and responsibility. pet ownership in this country is becomingly increasingly -- serious (?) - if that's the right word. people will pay for chemotherapy, kidney transplants, and extraordinarily expensive surgeries to save the lives of family animals. these people obviously take their roles as guardians seriously. that said - there are still MANY people who bring home an animal, tire of it for one reason or another - and simply dump the animal at the pound or - worse - on the side of the road. recently, my grandfather asked me if i'd come to my senses about all the animals - if i was ready to get rid of some of them. i was shocked. what kind of responsibility would that demonstrate?

and yet, as i look around me at other vets - i realize that we are part of the problem. there are vets within my school (doctors that i respect for their capability and knowledge) who give up animals for various and frivolous reasons. adopt a pet, keep it for a while, tire of it, send it away. i received an email not too long ago (a mass email) from a professor asking if anyone was interested in taking a gecko home for free with his whole set-up. apparently, their son had lost interest in the animal. i was surprised and disappointed. what kind of message does that send to their son? it's ok to do something for a little while - but there's no obligation. if you get bored, move onto the next thing. i guess i'm trying to draw a parallel here between responsibility for the decisions one makes and the problems with our civilization. divorce is on the rise. and why not? when you're tired of being married - just move on. responsibility and living with the decisions one has made - while learning to make better and more informed decisions is part of growing up and maturing. unfortunately, i don't think that many people ever reach a mature frame of mind. owning pets, owning a house, being married, paying bills on time, not spending money you don't have - those are all responsibilities. they aren't always fun - but ... that doesn't change the fact of their existence.

my 2nd rumination is along the lines of extremism. i went to petsmart the other day - and saw a pitiful, feather-plucked, beautiful african grey for sale. he was shorn of tail feathers and wing feathers from self-mutilating. it tore my heart. for a moment, i saw clearly why some people hate humans and see them as a detriment to nature. it started me down a mental path on extremism. i guess i was thinking along the lines of PETA. what makes people extremists? willing to blow up children? nurseries? civilians? who chooses a life cut off from normalcy - full of death and destruction? or on a lesser scale - who chooses a life of constant struggle to achieve a specific goal? and why? the great majority of people are complacent with their lives. content to go along - live - without ever stirring up the pond. and some seek a life of discord. these people that choose to be violent or to protest - why don't they make an honest contribution to the world? become medical doctors or researchers or teachers - actually try and change the plight of those under their chosen cause? i don't know. i'm not saying much here that's coherent and i'm certainly not shedding any new light on the situation. i do wonder though - if i'm one of the complacent sheep - plodding along in my paddock - not too overly interested in the world around me -- only in my life. i do want to make a difference, as a vet though. whatever i wind up doing. i would like to have some impact on the health and safety of humankind. . .

ok. well - that wasn't very interesting. sorry. hope you didn't read that expecting some kind of epiphany.

i finished reading wicked. it was disappointing. the end felt rushed and strange - out of character with the rest of the book. i think it's because (maybe) maguire had to write a story for an ending (since the fate of the wicked witch of the west was already well-known). i don't know. i really enjoyed it up until part three - then it just didn't seem as good. i'm reading anna karenina now. yeah, i know. tolstoy? during vet school? but i've been wanting to sink my teeth into it for a while, so why not now? school is out in 3 weeks anyway. i'll still be reading it then, i'm sure.

thanksgiving was nice. we went to the ashes and spent a lot of time with my family. i got to spend a good bit of time with both of my families. i ate some turkey -but not as much as i usually do. i do love turkey, though. i guess that's all. i need to study.