i've decided that i am definitely bipolar. i have my giddy highs and my down in the depths of hell lows. not really bipolar - mind you - i don't believe in medicating or anything - but vet school is making me crazy. today was a bad monday. i got up feeling 'off' - then i spent all day at school from 8-5. i got dinner with jim for about 45 mins, then went back to school. where i stayed until 11:30p - cloistered in the reeking, fluorescently lit anatomy lab. i then came home, showered, checked email, and studied until now, 2am. i am going to bed. finally. all this preparation is for my anatomy lab practical on wednesday. it promises to be daunting. 25 questions on dissected and plastinated specimens of the horse (mainly), cow, pig, sheep, and goat. the 25 questions cover 120 pages of material, about 40 pages of notes, and about 20 pages of diagrams. i'm trying not to hyperventilate...keep perspective...and whatnot. but today it didn't help. you know things are bad when you cry before 11am on a monday morning. jim came to get the soobie - so he could work on the cv joints or something - and sat in an ables room in the library while i had a mini-nervous breakdown. money is bad right now, thanks to the thankless work jim does at pellissippi and my absolute inability to have a job and go to vet school. it really sucks. the good news is that - since i'm a vet student - i can get more *YAY MORE SCHOOL DEBT* financial aid. about $6000 more. so those of you that we owe money to - look for it in Tminus 2 weeks
-hopefully.

i can't think of much else to relate. i did have a fairly relaxing weekend. i went riding with a friend at steve/staceys. i rode henry, the same horse i always do. unfortunately, he decided to run away with me toward the barn. at a mad gallop. and normally, this isn't much of a problem. but i haven't ridden in a long time, so i lost both my stirrups (we had just jumped a jump, mind you) and was basically relying on my weak thigh muscles to keep me in the saddle. we galloped in a big circle. i knew that i was going to fall off - without a doubt. i couldn't get him to stop galloping, i had no stirrups, and no control. and yet - miraculously - my thigh muscles and riding skills didn't fail me, and i stuck with him. we stayed together. it took us about 60 secs to gallop 2 BIG circles and come back to a walk and then a stop. today, i can barely hobble - my legs, arms, and back are so sore from trying to pull a 1700lb 17.2 hand thoroughbred from a gallop
:( anyway, no injuries and i stayed on.

saturday night, i went to a friends get together with alison and got pleasantly schmammered (mandy's word) on 3 glasses of white wine and 1 glass of red. it was a nice relaxing night with friends. unfortunately, i woke up with a stomach bug (nausea, diarrhea - no it wasn't the wine) that kept me in bed most of sunday. but i'm okay today :) other than the mini-breakdown and 2 cries i've had.

i feel okay now. i'm going to bed. i get to sleep in a whole half hour tomorrow because no class till the LATE hour of 8:30.

night all.