Wednesday, November 30, 2011

1 week left

My maternity leave ends on Wednesday, Dec 7, and I descend into the fray of veterinary emergency medicine once again. Currently, I am having very mixed feelings about this.

During my 3rd trimester, I was absolutely positive that I wanted to become a stay-at-home mother. The thought made me inexpressibly happy. Now, almost 9 weeks on the other side of my time at home, I realize that I would probably go mad without the challenge of my job. I love what I do quite sincerely. I also love being domestic - cleaning the house, fixing dinner, and the like. It is quite satisfying. I also cherish being home with my beautiful, sweet daughter.

Since I enjoy both things so much, I think being a working mom will be the best option for me.

ER medicine is a mixed bag for motherhood. While offering intense, long hours - ER medicine also offers long stretches of time off to enjoy with my family. I make more money than my GP counterparts, leading to less stress related to financial burdens. Further, despite some shortcomings that I have elucidated here, I have a great job in a bad economy. I'm thankful for that every day.

It's going to be a big adjustment. I know I'm probably going to miss things with my daughter. On the other hand, I hope to be a strong role model for her. I want her to grow up knowing that she can be anything she wants to be and still make time for a family. I also want her to grow up financially secure and to never have to worry about our finances. Growing up with 5 siblings, money was always tight for us, and early on, I worried a great deal about my parents' financial situation. I have carried this stress with me ever since childhood, and I will likely die with it. Hopefully, careful planning and saving will prevent Evaline (and our future children) from facing these worries.

T minus 7 days!

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